Today, Friday, December 4th, year 2020, while sitting in the reclining with baby in my arms, I figured that it’s already been 13 months and 13 days of me being a first-time mom.

How time flies. Now, she’s no longer a baby – baby. Although I still call her baby and she will always be my baby.

CHANGES

A lot has changed since she was born. She can walk now. She imitates us. She tries to talk on the phone like her dad and she makes sounds like I do. The sound I make when I am upset telling her not to do certain things, like throwing toys or spitting food.

She can tell us what she wants to do. Like when she points to the TV to watch her favorite show cocomelon or when she hands us the bubble sword or the colored top. She can tell me when she is thirsty, too. Yes, she drinks water now. When she was exactly one, on her birthday, she started drinking water, straight from the glass. Before her first birthday, it was very very hard to make her drink water from her sippy. She just didn’t like it. She just won’t.

STILL MY BABY

But, one thing does not change. She is still a boobie-lover baby. She just won’t give it up yet. Still like a newborn. Boobie upon waking up, snacks, nap time and bedtime. And sometimes, well, most of the time, she prefers boobie over food. I have to do many tricks so she’d eat her food. Although sometimes she’s unpredictable and she would eat like a lion. She likes fruits. She loves oranges and bananas. But, boobie is what she loves most.

FIRST FEVER, FIRST MISHAP

A week before her birthday, she got her first fever. I took her right away to the clinic and she got her medicine. That was October 16. That morning we went for a walk and she was very happy and singing while we were walking. But, at noon, her left cheek turned very pink and she was warm. She ate a lot for lunch but threw up minutes later so I decided to take her to the clinic. She got better the next day.

About a week later, the worst thing happened. It was a cold day and I decided to move the humidifier from the Japanese room to the living room. She was amused by the smoke coming out if it and later touched the humidifier and got a burn in her tiny hand. The right hand. Of course, it was my fault. Why did I put the humidifier on the floor where she can reach? I felt like I was the most stupid, useless mother in the world. Poor baby.

That was when I decided to take her to her doctor again. She had runny nose for days and I was hoping it will just go away by itself but no it didn’t. Runny nose and a burn are more enough reasons to go see her doctor.

If only I could turn back time, never would I put that humidifier on the floor. Now, that mishap will haunt me forever. I couldn’t forgive myself for weeks. Well, now, I feel more forgiving to myself coz the burn mark is almost gone. It’s a learning curve.

MORE TIME WITH BABY

Another thing, we decided not to put her in daycare next spring, which means me, being a full-time mom is extended. We realized she is just too little to be left in the care of strangers. At first, I was kind of disappointed because, yeah, I wanted to go back to work. Be my old self again. But, I can’t leave my baby. She is the most precious person, the most important thing in our lives right now. And she needs me. So, I stay as a full-time mom.